The Pastor's Ass
The Pastor entered his donkey in a race and
it won.
The Pastor was so pleased with the donkey
that he entered it in the
race
again and it won again.
The local paper read:
PASTOR'S
ASS OUT FRONT.
The Bishop was so upset with this kind of
publicity that he ordered
the
Pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.
The next day the local paper headline
read:
BISHOP
SCRATCHES
PASTOR'S
ASS.
This was too much for the Bishop so he
ordered the Pastor to get
rid
of the donkey.
The Pastor decided to give it to a Nun in a
nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted
the following headline
the
next day:
NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.
The Bishop fainted.
He informed the Nun that she would have to
get rid of the donkey so
she
sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the paper read:
NUN
SELLS ASS FOR $10.
This was too much for the Bishop so he
ordered the Nun to buy back
the
donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run
wild.
The next day the headlines read:
NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.
The Bishop was buried the next day.
The moral of the story is . .. . being
concerned about public opinion
can
bring you much grief and misery . . even shorten your
life.
Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and
you'll be a lot happier
and
live longer!
That was great! LOL
ReplyDeleteMade me laugh too! :D
ReplyDeleteHilarious!!!!
ReplyDeleteThought ya might like it! :D
ReplyDeleteAH! Love it! The moral is so true too!
ReplyDeleteIt is, I know far too many people just like that too!
ReplyDeleteAwwww...who CAN'T love a good donkey joke?! :-)
ReplyDeleteThey would be an ass not to!! hahah
ReplyDeleteThis is funny! SOrry for not getting back at you sooner..My kids blog about their work so I have been helping them..
ReplyDeleteI changed the link it should work.
My dog started to scratch like crazy when we moved to Texas from California.
Try to rinse off the dog after being outside in the grass to remove it to start with. I also give our dog an oatmeal bath. Other things I add to the water is apple cider vinegar which can also be used to wipe off the body in order to remove toxins.
I add tea tree, lavender, geranium, chamomile to water or calendula/witch hazel infusion and spray the body or use in bath. I also add detox herbs like burdock and dandelion, red clover, to her food (cleansing is important) it can be made as a tea or sprinkle on the food if they come in capsules.
Homeopathic remedies are something you might want to look into, they are fairly inexpensive for what you get. It is hard to say which ones since it depends on the symptoms, but you can ask in a health food store or check an online store.
Our dog got so bad that we had to change the diet, we removed all grains and red meat and she is currently on a allergy diet. We add omega 3 to her food, apple cider vinegar, vitamins and so on..
When it comes to natural antihistamines, we use NSP formulas, but in general Vitamin C Quercetin and nettles have anti-histamine properties.
Good links:
http://www.shirleys-wellness-cafe.com/petallergies.htm
http://www.petcarenaturally.com/articles/using-whole-food-supplements.php